Friday, July 18, 2025

Born

It's good not to be born as a man For all men are considered chauvinist 

Its good not to be born as a woman

For women are never really safe from men


It's good not be born as a dog

For they are always dependent on human kindness


It's good not be born as a cow

For they can't even feed their offsprings well

 

It's good not to be born as a hen

For their end is always between the teeth of humans


It's good not to be born as a rat

For only Jerry and Mickey live for long


It's good not to be born as a cat

Nevermind, it's probably good to be born as a cat


It's good not to be born as a mosquito

For their food source tends to smash them to gory death


It's good not to be born as a tiger

For they only exist in protected status


It's good not to be born as a lion

For they are considered kings of jungles that don't exist


It's good not to be born as a elephant

For they never wears phants while slogging away for humans


It's good not to be born as an ant

For they are killed in hundreds by angry humans


It's good not to be born at all

But do we have a choice?

So, might as well live once we are born

And if possible live happily

Till the very end.

Sunday, May 25, 2025

AI 183

Are you okay travelling in Air India? It was a tough question to answer especially when one has to spend 15 and a half hours in an Air India flight. But then I had never experienced 15.5 hours of travelling in Air India and had only heard of other's narrations about the experience. So, I said okay. I was in Bangalore and had to fly to Delhi to board this long-haul flight. From there the fifteen and a half hour flight was supposed to take off three hours later. A day prior to the travel data, I got an email from Air India informing me that the flight from Delhi was delayed by three hours. This meant that I reached my final destination at 10 pm instead of 6:40 pm. That did not sound good. I would have preferred to reach in the evening rather than the night, but the choice was made and die has rolled. 

The six hours at the Delhi airport was spent in having lunch, coffee, visiting restrooms, editing the book and watching K drama. It went away like a breeze. At the security check, the security personnel asked the old woman standing beside me to open her bag for checking. Many food items including two bags of bitter gourd emerged from the bag. The man said, "I am looking for chillis". The woman said "There are no chillis. I have some paratha and pickles. Do you want some son?" He responded "No aunty, I brought lunch from home. Where are you going?" She responded, "To Oman, to meet my son".  

Later, I walked towards a lounge. I showed the set of cards I had and asked, "Will any of this allow me entrance into this lounge?" She looked at each and commented "This can only be used in airports outside India. This one will require you to pay 3700 rupees for two hours. This one requires 3000 for two hours."  I sighed in disappointment and said "Okay, I will pay 3000 rupees." She said, "Do you want to check the lounge because we don't refund once you pay for it?" I felt insulted but realized that it is better to be insulted than pay 3000 rupees for two hours. I said it is ok and walked off. I realized that even if I make a lot of money someday, I will never be rich. I said to myself in my head "You will never drive a BMW man." A passerby looked at me quizzically. I realized that I has used my voice and not my mind voice.

At 5 pm I walked into the cordoned area around the gate for boarding the flight and sat in a chair close to the gate. Within 5 minutes we were asked to leave the cordoned area because we can only enter that area after we went through a security check. Flights to US demanded multiple levels of security checking. So, everyone walked towards the entrance of the cordoned area. It was more like an amble than a walk. Most of the passengers on the flight were elderly who carried many pieces of luggage with them. So, it took them some time to get out of the cordoned are. Actually, they did not get out of the area at all. The line started outside but soon took a U turn and came right back into the cordoned area. The entrance of the area being narrow, everyone just stood there. Soon the security personnel came and shoed everyone outside. 

The queue outside was not formed like a straight line either. It was rectangular in shape with the beginning and end of the queue barely differentiable. Right outside the entrance was a drinking water fountain that was controlled by IR light. As the people, in the queue stood close to the IR sensor, water started pouring out of the tap sporadically. A person standing ahead of me felt bothered by this and tried his best to stop the water flow by touching the various parts of the water fountain. But nothing worked. So, he gave up and looked sadly at the water flowing out. I had my headphones on and so was in no position to inform him the reason for the apparent malfunction. 

Right in front of me was a young mother with her five year old son, who was handcuffed to her. By handcuff I don't mean the one used by the cops. There were two soft pads that were tied around the mother's and son's wrists. The two pads were attached to each other using a thick wire that was wound in loops. The boy only had the liberty to be in a radius of one and a half metres from the mother when he stretched the loops. But that was not enough for the boy he pulled the wire to free himself off it or drag his mother with him. But he was too small and could not achieve either.  Finally, he screamed and shouted in frustration. After some time, his mother gave up and took off the handcuffs. As a result, he found himself free within the rectangular queue. But he was not satisfied by that for he wanted to break out of the rectangle. But a few people who had noticed the happenings did not let him out of the rectangle. Finally, when he managed to break out of it, one person ran behind him, caught him and brought him back to the mother who promptly handcuffed him again. 

By this time, the queue started moving. The old people who occupied the queue had no idea what was to be done and there were too few security personnel to manage the confusion. People did not keep their mobiles inside the bags for scanning and so were sent back by the security person checking the people with a metal detector. Some kept the bag in the Xray machine but did not wait for body scanning. Some walked through the metal detector too early. Some came out of the area after security check to go to the restroom and tried going back without checking. The security personnel became frustrated and complained "What do I do? The people don't listen to anyone ".  

Many minutes later I sat down in my seat. For the first time in many years, my age was lower than average age of the people who were around me. The person sitting behind me had a loud voice and was causing a lot of confusion. One of the members in his party was assigned the seat 49E but he wanted 51E. So, he walked up and down the aisle uttering 49E and some other words in Hindi loudly. Finally, when an old lady came to occupy 51E, he asked her to sit in 49E. The lady did not seem to understand what was happening but occupied the seat 49E anyway.

The flight was filled with parents of various ages visiting their children abroad. One couple proudly announced to another "Our son is in Berklee university. We are going for her graduation."  Most of them were not clear about the requirements of flying and tended to walk around even when the seat belt sign was on. The flight attendants did their best to remind them to not walk around but at some point they gave up in frustration. I also got the feeling that the captains tended to forget to switch off the seat belt signs. They probably thought anyway no one would follow the sign, so might as well leave it on. 

The lady sitting next to me was filled with curiosity. She and her husband tried charging their mobile phone but were unable to insert the adapter into the plug point. A few minutes later, I charged my phone using the USB point available for charging. She observed my actions keenly, then yanked the USB chord from the adapter that her husband held and went on to charge their phone in a similar manner. Later, when flight attendant came by pushing the drinks trolley, I saw a bottle of Teachers standing proudly at the front. It reminded me of my teaching days and so I got a quarter cup of it with 3 cubes of ice. The lady looked at me intently and asked, "What is it?" I felt stumped and did not know how to respond. I finally gave the worst possible response "Alcohol, Whiskey". She covered her nose with her blanket and looked away.

I usually love the entertainment system in these long flights and end up watching three or four movies during the fifteen and half hour flight. But the entertainment system in this flight was bad. The display was not great, and the user interface was not responsive at all. I had to click a button or swipe a few times before the interface reacted. I tended to apply to much force and was worried that the screen would break. Worse still was that they gave us a low quality ear plugs for audio rather than the over the ears headphones. The audio sounded terrible coming through it. Still, I decided to watch a movie; I can't remember which one now. As the title of the movie came up, the screen went blank. The flight had just started taxiing and system had rebooted. Soon, the phrases like "Starting system", "Starting Android", "Initialising application" appeared successively on the screen. Finally, the welcome screen appeared. Once again, I touched and swiped multiple times to restart the movie. But the screen went blank again. I gave up. I was reminded of a similar experience I had many years back. When the screen came back on, I decided to watch the flight path and details of the flight. Though there was an option to see this information, the application informed "Information not available". I switched the monitor off and took out my mobile. I started watching the two downloaded episodes of "Extraordinary Attorney Woo".

At some point during the flight I noticed the person sitting diagonally across the aisle, a fair old man, dressed in traditional north Indian attire. I noticed that he was looking through the movies available in the entertainment system. There was nothing odd with that except for the fact that all the information about the movies were written in Korean. I looked at him and wondered if he could be a Korean who had lived in India for many decades. It did not seem so. His attire and haircut were too desi for him to be anything but a desi. A little later I saw that an episode of the 'Big Bang Theory' was running on his screen but I was not sure if he was watching it or not. 

Three hours into the flight, the two episodes that I had downloaded had been watched and dinner was consumed. I had nothing to do other than sleeping and listening to music. I am not sure how much I slept but it was more than usual though the sleep itself was not comfortable. Nearly 16 hours later after the flight landed, the lady sitting beside me asked "You have water?" When I said yes, she stretched out her hand. For a moment I was tempted to say 'No, that water is mine" but then I remembered that I was old and had to be benevolent. Besides I had another half a bottle of water. So handed over the full bottle of water to her. She grabbed the bottle from my hand and without thanking me handed it to her husband. I was not too bothered by her lack of courtesy. They had boarded the flight from Delhi and nothing better could be expected from her.  I decided that I should avoid taking internation flights into and out of Delhi and started deboarding.

Wednesday, May 21, 2025

Dead end

The whole idea of living is to get through the day so that one can sleep at night, only to wake up the next day and live through it. That does not sound encouraging. But it depends on how one looks at it. If getting through the day is a chore then life does not seem very encouraging. The activities of the day would seem dreary and at the end of the day, one would hit the bed dreading the dawning of the next day. But if there are activities of interest that sparkle among these chores, then the days and nights seem more welcoming. Of course there are exceptions.  Regardless how one looks at one’s life, some nights seem to last forever as the next day is so exciting that sleep eludes and one keeps tossing and turning in the bed waiting for sleep or dawn to arrive. When the dawn finally arrives, one finds that the sleep of the previous night was not enough and that some of the excitement from the previous night is lost to the lack of sleep. Through half open eyes one looks at life spinning around and wonders when one will be able sleep well. At that moment, one... 

Damn it! It's about time one replaced all these ‘one’ in the previous paragraph with ‘I’. From now I will use ‘I’ instead of ‘one’. If necessary, the one who is reading this piece for God knows why can reread all the above written material replacing all the ‘one’ in the previous paragraph with ‘I’. Note: one of the ‘one’ mentioned in the previous sentences refer to ‘you’ and not ‘I’.

... At that moment, I heard the words from the Pink Floyd song 'Free Four', which goes 'Life is warm short moment, death is a long cold rest'. The second part of that line has made me look at death yearningly. I mean one (this ‘one’ can also be replaced by ‘you’ but I don't want to tell this to you directly and so am using ‘one’ instead of ‘you’. I now think I am taking this ‘one’ business too far and should stop it. One hopes... I mean I hope I stop it now. Damn, there are too many sentences here. I should not have placed it inside bracket but I have already placed the opening brackets and so I have no choice but to close it now. Here it goes.) Oh lord, where was I? Oh yes, the 'long cold rest' from Free Four.

You might think that the cold of the long cold rest might detract me from the resting part. Nope, It does not! I have lived most of my life in Chennai and love the cold rest when the air conditioner is blasting at 16 degrees and I am lying under a thick layer of blanket. If the line in the song went 'death is a long hot sweaty no fan due to a power cut rest' then I would have looked at death with dread. But then this song was written by folks from Britain, which is a cold country where people are buried in the cold earth. So cold rest makes sense from their point of view. But I live in the hot, hot Chennai and belong to a creed of people who cremate people. Cremate is a word used to hide the word burn. So, in my case I am not sure if will be a '...long cold rest'. It probably would be '... long and terribly hot rest'. Damn! I should not have thought about that. Now I don't look forward to death. I must add that people in my creed go through a lot of post death customs involving close relations of the dead dipping a million times in a river to cool down the soul of the dead. But in case, that will not be of much help either. The other day the one who should do all this dipping on my passing away informed me "Listen, don't expect me to do all this shit, ok? Nothing more than burning for you." So, no cooling down for me, no departing for me. I am going to be around haunting my loved ones and unloved ones too. 

Going off on a tangent, I love this song. It's a happily sung miserable song. Such songs in the background make the miserable parts of life hummable. I love the way the group starts off with "One, two, free four". For a long time, I thought they went "One, two, three, four" but no, it is not 'three, four", it is "free four". Cool trick. This song is a part the album called 'Obscured by clouds" and the whole album is brilliant. This album was followed by "Dark side of the moon" and already many elements of the latter album appear in a raw form here.

I find death fascinating. One day you are a person who is giving pleasure and pain to others, the next day you are a body, the day after a memory and soon not even that. But that is all in the mind of others but what about you? What happens to you? Do you exist beyond death? There are many who think so. Some believe in heaven and hell which is a concept that cannot be written off, but it sounds ridiculous. I can’t imagine a world where Amul butter grows on trees, nor one in which one is fried in Amul butter. Reincarnation is not believable at all. I mean I can't remember my previous births and so I have no reason to believe that they exist. Of course, it is possible that this is my first birth and so I can't remember my earlier births. But I know almost no one who remember their earlier birth. There are one or two who think they have some idea of their previous births, but I am not sure if I agree with that side of their mental faculties and so I am ignoring their beliefs So, I don't think reincarnation works. The same goes for ghosts. Never seen one and so won't believe it. The day I start seeing one I have to start checking the functioning of my brain. Soul is a possibility but what the fuck is a soul? It does not seem like anything other than heat and dust. So maybe soul wins! This is a comforting thought. After going through the hardships of life, one ends up becoming heat and dust. No afterlife of any sort, just live, die and become poof. Life is a warm short moment and death, cold or not, is a long rest anyway. 

So I live
Through the hardships
Thrown at me
By life and the people in it
With the hope that one day
Neither they nor I would exist
To give and take hardships
All I have to do is to wait
Wait for that day to come.
The end.

Saturday, May 3, 2025

In-cat-ation

There's a cat on the floor
Not a real one
It's just a sketch
Just a graffiti.

There's a cat on the floor
Looking up at the sky
It's just a sketch
Just a graffiti.

People love their cats
Walking around leisurely
But this one's a sketch
Just a graffiti.

Parakeets on the tree
Chatting noisily
Looking at the cat
It's just a graffiti.

This cat's at this end
At the other end another
Neither of them real
Just graffitis.

In pops a question 
Why do they exist?
Does it really matter
For they are just graffiti.

The cats come to life
To roam these streets
No longer sketches
Not just graffiti.

Terrorizing the rats
Praying fervently 
For them to be sketches
Just graffiti.

But isn't it ridiculous
Writing about cats
They are only sketches
Only graffiti.

But there are no rules
On what I write
Though its about a sketch
About a graffiti.

In the end
It's all real
Yet nothing's real
For its all a sketch
A graffiti.

Wednesday, April 30, 2025

Fish out of water

And I sat there 
Feeling like a fish out of a pond
No, no, not fish
I prefer to say I sat there
Feeling like a pond out of an octopus
Nope, that's messed up 
For its an octopus out of a pond
But in fact
Octopusses don't live in ponds
Worse, I got that metaphor wrong 
Never was it a fish out of a pond
It always was a fish out of water
So octopus out of water it is
But again, it should be said
That octopusses survive out of water
For twenty minutes or so
So I probably felt more like a fish
Not an octopus 
Though I wish I felt like an octopus 
With its eight legs or was it hands?
But no, I am just a fish
With no hands
No nose to breath on land
Forced to stay in water
To avoid feeling like a fish out of water

Saturday, April 26, 2025

Wayward incidents

He looked at the level of the liquid inside the bottle he held in his hand. He gave a smile of satisfaction and took a swig out of the bottle. He looked at the vehicles passing by and wondered where everyone was going. He shouted "What's the hurry? Take it easy. Have a drink, have many drinks. Take it easy people." A couple of people passing by looked at him displeased. He ignored them. No, that would be incorrect to say. He did not notice them; he was completely unaware of their existence. He took another swig of the liquid and said "What is the point of existence if you slog through your existence so that you can exist? You don't need much in life. Some food, some drink, some cloths, ... No, no, no, you don't need cloths, you clothe yourself for others sake. No, no, no, that’s not true either. You do need some cloths for the winters but only to keep yourself warm. You could wrap a thick blanket around you and walk around the place. You don't need much. Some food, something to drink, a blanket, maybe two. Thats all. Nothing more. No car, no house, no marriage, no children, no nothing. What is the use of a house when you have a blanket, a nice thick blanket. People, take it easy!" One of the passersby got annoyed by his shouting and said "Quiet man!" He looked in the direction of the protesting voice and asked "What affects you? Is it the loudness of my voice or my words? Which is sharper? Tell me, tell me now."

He took another swig from his bottle and passed out. By the time he woke up, his surroundings had become empty. He looked at his bottle. It wasn't empty. He smiled at it and took it towards his mouth. When the bottle came down, it was empty. He lay the bottle on the ground and gave it a push. It rolled down the pavement noisily. He looked in direction of the rolling bottle and sang shakily "Keep rollin, rollin, rollin, rollin..." The sound of the rolling bottle stopped. He got up shakily. He looked to his left and said "Hmmm, where is it?". He looked to his right and said "Ah! There it is". He walked unsteadily towards the  bicycle that was standing against the wall. After taking a few steps, he said "Stay! Stay right there, cycle. Stay!" On reaching the cycle, he held its handlebar and said "My steed! I hope someone fed you. Someone did? You feeling full and healthy? Yeah? Good, let's go." He climbed the cycle and started pedalling. The handlebar of the cycle went this way and that. With it the cycle and he too went this way and that. He stopped and admonished the cycle "Listen Steed. Did you consume alcohol? Yes? No wonder you are going all around the place. Do not drink alcohol. It's bad for your liver. Haven't you heard the saying 'if you don't have a liver, you will no longer be a liver, for you will be deader than a lever'. What? No, mmm mmmm. I did not make that up. Stakesbear wrote it in ‘As long as it goes’. Anyway, the point is, no alcohol for you. Now shake your head, clear your head and then go." He shook the cycle's handlebar vigorously. In the process, he lost his balance and fell into a hedge. He called out from inside the hedge "What! Home already? Good night steed".

Back home, morning started at 9 am, during holidays that is. But here, on most mornings, she woke up at 5 am. Fifteen minutes later, she walked through the cold air. On most mornings, it was so cold that she had to touch her nose to ensure that it had not fallen. Fortunately, the nose fought bravely against the cold and managed to stay in its place. It was numb but alive. On some mornings, she wondered why she was putting herself through such misery. The warm bed below and the warmer blanket above seemed like a perfect place for her to be in during such cold mornings. But her father and uncle loved to walk during these unearthly hours, and she liked their company. At most times, they talked about the stock markets and their respective jobs. These topics did not amuse her. But at times, they talked about other topics. More than anything, she liked spending time with her father. So, every morning she walked behind them listening to him talk. 

At that time of the day, only a few vehicles plied on the road. Yet, all the traffic signals worked religiously with red turning yellow and yellow turning green. Depending on the greens and reds, the pedestrians were allowed to cross the road. Their route for the morning walks required them to cross many signals and every signal displayed a red coloured palm asking them to wait till the empty roads became safe for them to cross. Having lived for many years on this planet, her father and uncle realized the futility of waiting for the red palm to disappear before crossing the empty roads. But she was young and had not lost her idealist nature yet. So, she waited at most signals for it to give her a go ahead. She pressed the button at her end of the road to inform the gods who controlled the signals that she wished to cross the road. The gods responded instantly and menacingly by saying "WAIT". Every few seconds they reminded her to wait. She waited sincerely for the red palm to disappear. Finally, when the red palm disappeared, the gods announced that it is now safe to cross such and such a road. She ran across the road to catch up with her walk mates.

Like every morning, on this morning too, the waiting and catching up game continued. The midpoint destination of their journey was a coffee shop close by. The Iced Vanilla Latte at the coffee shop had captured her fancy. Her uncle was flummoxed by her affection for this cold drink. He asked, "How can you drink this cold drink on such a cold morning?" She responded, "I like it that way." When the coffees arrived, she found the milky heart shape that floated on top of her father's coffee fascinating. She clicked a picture of it and added it to her collection of milky hearts. 25 minutes later they started their journey back. The way back seemed colder due to the cold breeze blowing steadily against them. She walked at a slight distance from her uncle and father. Soon, she passed by an SUV that was parked in the parking lot of a mall. She had noticed this vehicle almost every day. A lady sat inside the vehicle looking at her smartphone. She wondered aloud "Why does this lady sit inside the car so early in the morning, every day of the week?" She had seen the lady on her way to the cafe. She was still there on the way back. This meant that she sat inside that vehicle for at least 45 minutes. Her uncle heard her and responded, "Maybe there are too many people in her house, and she wants a few minutes of peace before starting her day." He continued "Maybe she is a school teacher who has many children of her own at home too. So, this is probably her moments of peace." She glared at him and said, "If she were a teacher, she would love children." His uncle retorted "Not all the time and not tens and hundreds of them every day. Haven't you heard the saying 'adhikamayal amridhamum vishamaane'. It’s probably like that." 

She did not like her uncle's logic. Teachers must love children regardless of how many there are in her life. She wondered why the lady became a teacher and why she had so many kids if she could not be with them all the time. At that moment, she realized that her uncle had only speculated about the lady. Neither her nor her uncle had any idea about her or her activities. She struck her forehead with her palm and said loudly "What's wrong with me?" At that moment, a voice from inside the hedge besides her responded "How would I know?" At the same time, she noticed a pair of legs jutting out of the hedge. She screamed, jumped over the legs and ran towards her uncle and father. 

He woke up from his sleep when he heard a loud voice asking, "What's wrong with me?" He felt confused. The voice did not seem familiar, and he was sure he did not know the person. He wondered how he was supposed to know what was wrong with the person. He responded, "How would I know?" In response he heard a scream and the sound of someone running away. He sat up and said "Hey". He saw the vague figure of someone running towards two others. He called out in their direction "But how would I know? I don't even know who you are. How do you expect me to know what's wrong with you? You should know it, but you are only a human. Humans do not have the ability to know what's wrong with them, they only know what's wrong with others. Don't worry. You are only a human." He sang "Human, human, human" in a robotic voice as he sank back into the bush.

Tuesday, April 15, 2025

Cybertruck














You can't a Ford a Tesla
Not the Cybertruck anyway
80k dollars for a truck
That looks like a stiff collar
A cardboard box half open 
A car drawn by a little hand
It ain't no good for you collar
Driving a Cybertruck
Is like being a driver muck
But there are a few
Who think otherwise
Five of them in just two days
Seen driving their cryber bucks
To Lord knows where
Can't be to hell
For Satan can't stand
Those stammer ducks
So they stand lined up
Outside their showroom
Waiting to be taken
By someone, just anyone