Random crap

Captain Dogod announced to his family "Life has just got crappy. Its got so crappy that it can't get any crappier. Wait! No! That's not true! Life has been crappier earlier and I hope it does not get that crappy for I don't think I have the stamina to go through that crap again. As crappier as today is, I hope it does not get any crappier."

Mrs. Dogod looked up from her book and shout "Will you cut that crap Will!"

Do the right thing!

The place would have been quiet. The irrepressible voices of the 23 children reverberated through the path. They were excited to be present among the wilderness. The city did not offer them with open spaces and clean air. The city offered them with a lot of noise, which they had got used to. They loved to carry it with them wherever they went. The important gift of silence offered by the wilderness went unnoticed. The elders in the group were too few to control the children. 

They reached the rock strewn bed of a stream. The water that had flown over the rocks had rounded them over the years. They lay strewn on the stream bed. The children sat down and marveled their shapes and colours. They took the rocks in their small hands and caressed them. They discussed their discoveries with their friends excitedly. They exchanged ideas on building stone towers. They traded stones and sticks to make their stone towers exciting. They were walking from one place to another carefully and at times without care. The rocks let out metallic sounds as they ran into each other under the children's feet. The adults watched them for a few moments. While their excitement was good to watch, the adults weren't happy. 

The intent of the walk through the jungle and the time spent on the stream bed was different. It was to bring in a sense of quiet. It was for the children to understand the importance of quiet and even enjoy it. But the children did not understand the need for quiet. They wanted to share the excitement of their findings and this resulted in a clash of intents. In such situations, the adults do everything in their power to ensure the children follow their way. They raised their voices and humiliated the children to silence. The children looked at each other unhappily but continued to work on their stone towers. The clink of the stone against the stone was the only sound besides the sounds of the forest.

The adults were not happy with this sort of silence either. They did not want the children to do anything. They wanted them to contemplate either through plain thinking or through thinking and writing and/or drawing. They stood on the beautiful dried stream bed and lectured the children. The children listened to the adults in growing bewilderment. They were not quite sure what was expected of them. So they started to talking to each other in hushed up tones at first. Soon their voices were heard in various parts of the jungle.

In the evening, they walked further to a nearly dried river bed. The river bed was strewn with many more rounded rocks. They seemed like giant pebbles and the children christened the place "the pebble place". This place was even more beautiful than the dried river stream. They ran to the puddles of water and looked into them expectantly. They squealed in happiness when they saw a crab tentatively prod its surroundings for food. One kid took out a peanut from his peanut candy and threw it into the water. The crab used its claw to investigate it. The investigations concluded satisfactorily and the crab slid back into its home between the rock under the water with the peanut in its claw. This crab was a small one. At another spot in the same puddle was a larger crab which did not bother to investigate but strode out of its home briskly, picked the peanut and rushed back inside. The squeals of delight drowned the peace and calm of the jungle. The adults seemed to be disturbed more than the residents of the jungle.

At another puddle, the children found a weird looking snail. If the creature was magnified a thousand times we would all have been running through the jungle screaming. It would have fit very well into a B-grade Hollywood science-experiment-gone-wrong or alien attack movie. Fortunately for us it was just a little larger than an adult toe. It glided through the water slowly. Its antennae moved here and there. The children looked at it intently for they were trying to decipher the location of its eyes. "There it is. That little dot under the antenna. Do you all see?" The children spent many minutes watching the apple snail move through the water.

At another puddle, a child gently threw a stone into the water to determine if a stick was a snake. When the stick moved, the children realized that the stick was a snake. One of the children said, it could be an eel. They craned their neck and looked at the creature intently. "No, its not an eel. Its a snake!" They spent the next few minutes tracking the snake go in and out of its home under the rock.

One child walked up to an adult and demanded that she wanted to meet the forest officials. The adult was perplexed and asked for the reason. She pointed at a puddle at some distance and said "that was such a quiet place. I wanted to sit and look at the water for sometime. But when I approached I saw three beer bottle peeping out of the water. The place stinks of alcohol. How can people be so irresponsible? I want to place a complaint with the forest officials." The adult's face lost its perplexed expression and gained a bewildered one.

A child lying quietly on the rock got up disturbed. He looked at the adult close by and said "why are these people being so noisy? This is such a peaceful place. Why are they disturbing the peace of this place?" The adult got up and led the child away. Seeing them, the other children followed them. The adult's face turned red with anger. She turned around and shouted at the children. She shamed them for not having noticed the dried animal poop on the river bed. It was children's turn to be perplexed. "Poop! Why should we notice the poop?" "How disgusting?" "Eeeks! Animal poop." The comments frustrated the adult further. She turned around and said "Forget it! Let us all go back. You don't deserve to be in this place."

One of the adults walked up to the girl sleeping peacefully on a rock. He had to nearly scream into her ears to wake her up. She woke up with a start and said "Oh! Did I sleep? I have not slept like this ever. I feel refreshed." She got up slowly and said she would be the last person to leave the place.

As they walked back, they crossed the river stream. A boy looked up at an adult and asked for permission to kick down two of the stone towers. The adult responded in a shock drenched voice "I knew you would say this. Why are so destructive?" He went on to lecture the child on the necessity to respect others and their works. He requested the child to avoid taking pleasure at the expense of other. The boy listened to the adult politely and shook his head in agreement. The next day at around the same time, the adult found that the two structures destroyed. He did not know for sure who had done it but he knew that the boy had passed the spot a few minutes earlier.

As warned, the walk next morning was long and arduous. The thorns that lined the path poked and prodded the walkers. At many places, the path was not really a path. It seemed that the path was identified through the whims and fancies of the guide. At many points, he would stop look left, right, up and down before turning around , walking some distance back and taking a left or right from the path. So it was a bewildering experience for the children. They could not fathom the reason for traversing through the millions of thorns. But they forgot about the thorns and pain when they reached the first stop; a pool of water in a dry riverbed with a large rock overlooking it. Some of the children climbed the rock and sat at the edge. Other looked at the fishes and plants in the water. The adults got into a huddle to discuss their next move. The guide and one of the adults wanted to go back as one of the children was finding it tough to walk. The remaining adults wanted to proceed. Finally the group decided to proceed.

On the way back, the hot sun took a toll on the children's stamina. Soon everyone's water bottles were empty and hunger started gnawing the children's stomachs. The adults bi- and trisected a few bananas and distributed them among the children. One of the adults promised to provide a magic potion. He went behind a tree and came back with a water bottle filled with the magic potion. He did not handover the bottle to anyone, instead poured a mouthful of the potion into everyone's open and demanding mouths. The children loved the potion and started identifying it. Someone said "it's Limca". Another said "no, it Gatorade", which was promptly rectified to "Getorade" by many. They demanded the identity of the potion but the adult laughed and moved on.

Just as the walk was nearing its end one girl said "I am going to faint". "No, you will not" said an adult. "I have fainted in Chennai itself" said the girl. "This is not Chennai" was the response. The girl completed the walk without fainting. But the girl whose ability the guide doubted struggled to get back. She was made to walk in the front to avoid being left behind. This slowed down the group and they were not happy. They complained constantly about the girl being slow. This and the tiredness affected the girl's morale and tears streamed down her cheeks as she walked back.

As Kenneth Anderson had written many years ago, the afternoon sea breeze started blowing in at around 2 pm. The verandah of the 99 year old guest house was the perfect place to relax. One of the adults started reading one of Kenneth Anderson's account on his hunt for a man-eater in that very forest.  The place had changed much from those days. Today, tigers and bears do not roam the forest. A few people talked about sighting wild dogs, leopards and deers in the forest. Cows and buffaloes grazed through the forest fearlessly. Like many forests in the country, the forest was called a forest due to the tree cover. In this case, there were more bamboos and shrubs than trees. There were more empty and broken alcohol bottles than animals in the forest. Kenneth Anderson's accounts were detailed and at times gory. But the description of events were done well and one could see the decapitated head rolling from side to side as one listened to the reader.

As the group walked along the jungle paths it seemed that hardly any life existed in the forest. This opinion changed when the bird watchers pointed out the many birds that resided in the jungle. Almost every tree had a bird. The cries of the birds were no longer the background music. The laughing dove laughed and even gave a glimpse to a few. The Grey Jungle Fowl cried from this bank of the dried river bed. A few moments later a fainter response came from the other bank. The two fowls conversed for a long time. The tone of the exchange seemed aggressive and a few thought that something foul was being exchanged between the fowls. But one of the guides informed that the two fowls were discussing the the time and location they would meet for a drink in the river.

At the end of day, the trip, like many other trips, threw more questions than answers. What is the intention of the trip? Is it to help the environment or the children or the adults? Humans tend to be loud and are capable of creating a mess easily. So how did the trip help the environment? The feeding of the crab seems innocent but ends up meddling with the life habits of the crab. That doesn't seem fair. Children learn about life and their environment through curiosity and exploration. They like to share their learning to exhibit their learning and also to validate it. They are in the process of discovering their world and discovery takes place through exploration and exchange of views. While silence and quiet are important in life, is it important at this young an age? Do we all remember ourselves when we were young? How silent were we? Can our own lack of silence be attributed to our lack of awareness? How aware can a 12 year old be?  I am sure there are "right" answers for these question but I wish we could have realistic answers for we do not live is a "right" world but a real world.

It is not necessary that we should do the "right" thing and not cause harm to the world. In many cases, we brush aside the harm we cause by trying to be "right". This has caused more harm to the world than good. We cause harm to the environment when we visit a forest or go for a trek. It is done for our own pleasure than to save the planet or to show our love for the planet. So why don't we accept this fact and enjoy life, instead of putting in artificial criteria to prove to ourselves that we are all the good citizens of the worlds unlike the beer-bottle throwers.

A good night

He was lying on his side on the bed and reading a seventh standard science book. I informed him that it was time for him to sleep. He closed the book and placed it on the floor. I told me that he had to see something interesting. He looked at me with curiosity. I switched on the new table lamp. Actually, it was not a new table lamp. We bought it ten years ago but were using it for the first time today. He looked at the light emanating from the lamp with interest. I switched off the tube light. He said "Wow! Its bright and beautiful". I smiled and pointed to the Buddha statue besides the lamp. It looked marvelous.

I switched off the lamp and walked over to the bed. I pecked him a good night and hugged him. I placed my ears against his chest and listened to his tiny heart's beat. 

I hate long talks

King Crimson sang a song not in the present century but in a decade full of classic songs. It begins with a line that touches my heart. "Talk, it's only talk" sings Adrian Belew who then chants different words; all synonyms of talk. 

Verse one starts with synonyms

Of talk starting with letter A

Verse two starts with synonyms

Of talk starting with letter B

Verse three starts with synonyms

Of talk starting with letter C

Verse four starts with synonyms

Of talk starting with letter D

Verse five starts with synonyms

Of talk starting with letter E

The synonyms do not proceed beyond 'E' as the song is titled "Elephant Talk". The reason for the Elephant in the title is "because of the sound elephants makes is similar to all speech must for this broken man, desperately seeking refuge from the cacophony." The tension in the song brings out this feeling brilliantly. 

If ever a movie is made on my professional life, this song would play in the background through the movie. My career has been submerged in cacophony of talk except for the two years when I was allowed to run an organization as per my wish. At every other point of time and place, the importance given to talk was unbelievable. Unfortunately, this has become true for the past two years too. There is too much of talk; talk that tries to decipher the inner nature of a person, which runs into a big problem. It is not static. By the time, we think we have understood the nature of a human, it has changed. Of course, I don't believe we have the ability to understand the nature of a human. For if we possessed this ability, there shouldn't be so many humans walking on the planet believing they are good. 

Humans have good in them but they possess a lot of evil too. The biggest evil that we possess is the belief  "I am good person who wishes good for everyone and everything". Rubbish! Most of us are not capable of thinking beyond our respective noses. When we do think about others it is usually to make our nose prettier. So I don't understand why we spend hours on hours discussing about our concern for the betterment of others. Instead, we can spend our time doing. Do something! Do anything! Just don't talk. Don't bloody ejaculate the right words to make others weep. It does not achieve anything other than you appearing like an angel, which you are not. As Eliza Doolittle sang

Words Words Words

I'm so sick of words

I get words all day through

Ever anxious eyes

Everyday for the past week her eyes scanned every corner of the office as soon as she entered it. But she did not see him. Her shoulders drooped and her already grave face turned graver. As the week proceeded even her melodious voice turned scratchy. She used the state of her voice as an excuse to avoid talking to others. She preferred to sit at the corner of her office and stare at the monitor. Her productivity had reduced by a shocking 75%. Everyone noticed the change in her but attributed it to her poor health. She was thankful for this convenient misunderstanding.

Exactly a week later, she saw him in the bus. Brightness crept back into her eyes and a smile appeared on her lips. She even hummed a tune as she walked to her seat. He smiled and waved to her. Her face resembled a smiley ball when she smiled back. It seemed to her this ride to the office was the best she had experienced. Even the long jam caused by an accident did not take her smile away. She closed her eyes, held the smile and hummed beautifully a mediocre song. She turned around and looked at him. He was busy conversing with others. Apparently, he had a lot to catch up. At times, his eyes met hers and they exchanged a smile.

It was yet another meeting day. As she sat in the room, she realized that he was sitting a few seats away from her. She cursed under her breathe. She should have picked a seat on the opposite side. Besides the smiles, she could only exchange a few words with him in the morning. Hardly enough to make up for the lost conversations from the previous week. She sat through the meeting feeling miserable. Unfortunately for her, neither he nor the people around him talked much during the meeting. So she could sneak a few peeks in his direction. As the morning proceeded, she lost the melodiousness in her voice. She waited in patient misery for the lunch.

She was the first person to walk into the dining room. As she served the food, an annoying friend joined her. He picked up a conversation that she was not interested in. Out of politeness she hmm-ed and ahh-ed through the conversation hoping he will pick her disinterest and stop the conversation. But the fellow's self obsessive nature took her hmms and the ahhs as interest. She was forced to share a table with the loquacious fellow. As ever, he was in a mood to converse and did not really care about the listener's interest or response. Her responses to his monologue reduced to a minimum. Time and again, her eyes searched through the faces in the dining hall. His absence annoyed her.

Finally, he walked in and settled down on a table with his plate of food. She quickly excused herself and got up. By the time she got to his table a few others occupied the seats around him. She stood at some distance from the table in confusion before walking away. She looked at him with a mixture of anger and sadness as she walked out of the dining hall.

During Kumblangi Nights

Fahadh Fasil's on fire. All his movies are fun to watch. When we heard the release of Kumblangi nights, we  decided to watch it. I did not bother to call the usual batch of friends and quietly booked three tickets. One of the friends was greatly offended by this act and expressed her displeasure. I was gladdened by her annoyance. The reviews said it was a great movie and they were right. The movie was an amazing watch. Many have reviewed the movie and I don't think I have anything to add. A couple of events during our presence in the theater should be recorded though.

Prior to the commencement of the movie an advertisement for Jinga gold was shown. It said "Jinga Gold for man's masculinity"with a man hugging a woman in bed. Though the movie is rated "U", the advertisement were a bit Jingastic for a "U" rating. Nice!

The theater also displayed a public service message which said "if you don't get the bill consider your food free". The thirteen year old sitting besides me expressed his displeasure about this message by stating "Yeah right! Like it will ever happen".

Everything but the music

One evening she called and said "you will be presenting songs to the children this week". He loved presenting songs to the children. He believed the music they listened to was pathetic and only exposing them to songs from previous century could salvage their musical tastes. He had presented music to children twice. During those times, he had tried to make it as intellectual as possible. He presented music by Amazonian tribes and Native Americans. Another time, he presented Violin recital by Shankar and a recital by a quartet of Ravel's composition. He also presented music by Dead can Dance. All soft and all in the higher realms of western and world music. 

This time, he toyed with the idea of presenting soundtrack from different movies. He had music from American Beauty, The Insider and one of the numbers by Ennio Morricone in his mind. But he decided not to play it safe this time. He decided to present the pop and rock music from the previous century. By that, he did not mean to play Michael Jackson or Pink Floyd. He planned to be a bit obscure. The first song to be played was obvious to him, Queensryche's "Out of Mind". The song was in his list of greatest songs ever made right from the moment he listened to it. It was like Rainbow's "Temple of the Kings"; the song struck a chord in his heart. He loved everything about the song; the riff that plays through the song, the heartfelt singing by Geoff Tate, the touching lyrics, the song's layout and the sad images the song evoked. Not many on the planet knew about this group. Almost no one he knew had heard of this song. He thought "the world has so many music lovers and yet when it comes to music, they don't go farther than their doorsteps".

Many years ago, he had bought a cassette seeing the name of the group and the album. It had turned out to be one of the best albums he had listened. It continues to be one of the best album he had ever heard. The album was "Automatic for the people" by REM. Since then he had heard a number of REM songs; not a single one bad. A song from the album "Night Swimming" was one of his favourite songs. It brought in a sense of peace and calm. He played the song at the gathering and many who had lived as adults in the 1990s came to him and thanked him for bringing back memory of those days. There are not many on the planet who are capable of not liking Michael Stipe singing "Night swimming deserves a quiet night".

Seattle has produced a number of great groups. Queensryche is one of them. They pioneered the progressive metal movement with albums like "Operation Mindcrime". In the early 90's, a set of groups from Seattle took the rock music world by storm. They brought in Grunge that almost killed many other sub-genre of rock and metal music. The groups were a part of the alternative rock movement pioneered by groups like REM in the early 80s. Pearl Jam was one of the groups that rose from Seattle in the early nineties. He could never forget watching the video of "Jeremy" for the first time. Eddie Vedder's singing and his powerful presence ensured that he was a Pearl Jam and Eddie Vedder fan forever. He liked them more than "Nirvana". From his point of view, Kurt Cobain could never match Eddie Vedder's singing. He loved almost all Pearl Jam songs from their initial five albums. Of the songs, he could only play "Nothing man" to the children. It was a soft and beautiful song. He was sure everyone would like the song.

As in the last two sessions, everyone loved his songs. Most people had not heard the songs or groups and were surprised that such good songs existed on the planet. A ten year old walked up to him and said "I liked your session but I did not like any of the songs you played. Why do you play such old songs?"